Wine Tasting

Wine wasted is time wasted—
And you’ll never get it again.
The cheeseboard and figs?
My god, and this time of year again?

Enjoy this pass around the sun—
The light tends to wane and ebb.

Midnight

Slowly I descend the stairs—
my hand on the rail.
She sits in the living room,
the back of her head
a silhouette in the TV’s glow—
channel after channel
there’s nothing on.
I pause upon the final step
and watch.

Inhaling, I approach her.
I rest my hand—I hesitate—on her shoulder.

“Honey, let’s go to bed.”

The Fire

alarm in the hallway
ringing down its length
the doors stay shut
no one exits

a crowd outside
bathed in a red glow
as the flames consume
no one exits

the fighters watch
the hose is on the truck
the flames pop
still, no one exits

Hate to see you go...

She walked away without a flip of the switch on the way out.
Left in darkness as the light narrowed to a line then went out.
Her silhouette sure looked good, though.

Rolled over since my knees ached kneeling on the wooden floor.
Wasn’t begging but pleading right up until she walked out the door.

Said something like I can’t go on without you. Please, baby. No!

She saw straight through all the way to me and said no, honey. No.
She turned to go.

Her silhouette sure looked good.

October 2021

I twisted about my torso.
I bent my knees until I made the floor. I got low.
I slid out and rolled until I faced up—
I saw the ceiling. The ceiling saw me.

It spun. I went around, funneled into my own damn mind.
I was with you. I saw the October air float
like a halo above you. I think the wind understood, too.

Oh, happiness finds me, usually suddenly
and not for long, but I cherish it.
There are moments sprinkled here and there
intermittently. In those moments I make sure to go
very slow-motion.

Isn’t it wonderful? To be rolling like I am?
To notice thoughts as if they were truth—
don’t snort at me. That’s exactly how we make ourselves:

I test the grass. The grass is wet. It only takes a moment
to decide I don’t care. I crisscross and you do, too.
We take a deep inhale of the city lit up before us. Mmmmhmm.
The air is cut grass and weed smoke. The light like lavender on silver.
You pass me the bag with a nudge and a nod. A smirk, too.
I pick out the apple fritter.

Socializing

In the group. Apprehending every possibility curtailed to me.
Nothing magnificent. Nothing hidden. All things processible are accessible.
Action, however, depends on commitment to the environment.
Do you value movement?

The monolith past midnight

Again the moon falls past the blackened hills and all the sky is purple still—
I connect the dots with my eyes and cry. There is no sleep for me—no sleep for me—
the wind agrees with me, it came to say. Now graciously blows away…

In the stillness and the quiet my eyes…drift…down…

My hands an even gray, and shadows. My arms, my knees: Gray. 

All of me underneath the starlight, buried to my ankles: Gray. And shadows. 
A hush. Maybe someone watching? Listen:
The trail that winds its way around me travels off until all is silhouette—
such is the night.

Many years pass and I remember.

I…I haven’t moved in some time. This vision…
this vision is all that I am: a moonlight sonata of a man.
Breathing in. Breathing out. Rising and escaping—to fall as morning dew
in some other universe. As if trying to see in the dark.
Such is the night.

Absolution

As the din dimmed, I collapsed into a solid point—
I tensed my reason and lost it whole.
I stood at eclipse’s edge. Saw the rime of light
shutter—then overtake me as well. 

What awaited, however, was not the expected void
but a vastness uncomprehended: singularity.

I understood at that moment of swallowing
there was an ever deeper delve.

So now, my friend,
I travel inward and am weightless.

Protector Maintains

Drained and nearing depletion—
Protector! Anger, Joy, Compassion
kept at Distance vigilantly. He sits Alone
while being guarded—no filling up.
It is a brutal sensation of waiting while drowning—yes,
Protector maintains.

The Man Who Sits and Waits

It is a quiet afternoon. The sun is out.
A breeze comes through the window.

A gentle rumbling enters—a vibration.
Yes, the world is alive.

Silence is on my mind. Not peace or fear.
Not serenity. Only space.

I am energy caught.
I am the man who sits and waits.

My heart did carry on

I was in the middle of writing you a song
when they came and kicked down the door.
They told me, “Son, you better get to sleep.”
I told them, “I’m getting back to her!”

That’s when they put the handcuffs on.
That’s when they read me my rights.
They said, “Boy, it’s time to move on.”
I told them my heart would carry on.

Yeah, my heart would carry on
through the slush and the mush and the shit.
My heart would carry on
no matter where they placed me,
no matter where they put me down.
Yeah, my heart would carry on.

When I finally got out,
the sky was red and the sun was out.
At the gate they turned away and said,
“Good luck out there in the wasteland.
You come back here and you’re dead.
Do you hear? If you come back here—you’re dead.”

So I went my way foot by foot—
it was hopeless though I walked the Earth.
Saw no one and thought no thoughts
other than maybe they were right?
Maybe they were right?

Oh, my heart would carry on
through the slush and the mush and the shit.
My heart would carry on
no matter where I slept at night,
no matter where I put me down.
Yeah, my heart would carry on.

Years and years went by until I sat by a fire’s side.
Lonesome, I looked out to count the stars and
your song came back to me.
Yeah, your song did come back.

I sat in wonder and marveled it.
I let it soak my skin—I was drenched with it.
I cried so hard I should have died.
Yeah, I cried so hard I should have died.

Yeah, my heart did carry on
through the slush and the mush and the shit.
Yo, my heart did carry on!
No matter where I found myself.
Yeah, no matter where I’m found!

Yo, my heart did carry on!